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Change the conversation

Every year for Black History Month, we dust off the books and stories about what is supposed to be an effort to increase awareness and respect for the contributions of black folks to America. Ideally, knowing that they were not limited to or by slavery and oppression would encourage and uplift a people seemingly mired in struggle. That’s great, but I have another suggestions: change the conversation.

Imagery is a strong and influential tool that has long shaped the reality of a people. What we see, too, has been embraced and duplicated by many. The negative images and imagery for too long have defined and been accepted as normal and ok; neither is accurate, but is accepted as a reality that must be abandoned.

Words are the second biggest influencer; we repeat what we believe to be true, and it serves as a reminder to ourselves and others of what we have been told we are or are not. Yet, much of what we see is no different or worse than that of other races and while that is no justification, it is also not our sole identify. We must stop embracing it as such. We must also stop saying that we are what we may not actually be, or more importantly what we don’t want to duplicated.

We don’t work together. We don’t trust each other. Black men don’t take care of their children. Blah, blah, blah. Every time we repeat these or any of the other numerous negative descriptions (and excuses), we etch them into our lives and into the minds of others. Stop.

Stop saying there are more black men in prison than in college. Stop repeating what you see and hear about black on black crime. Stop saying all the negative things you hear about black people, simply because that is what “they” say. The legacy of excellence, peace and community are there, and need to be embraced and elevated as truth.

And, after you commit to stop embracing and absorbing the image and repeating and becoming the message, then dedicate your efforts to erasing them both by better practices with your people. Speak. Be kind. Be supportive. Take, but give back. Be determined to change the reality that has been created for you and about you to one that is a more accurate reflection of who you are, who we are and all that we are capable of being. From medicine to music, together we’ve done and overcome a lot. We can change this, too.

Start now, and never stop. We are not as bad as they say we are; and only as bad as you believe.

Let It Rip Weekend: Trump, Russian hacking, and “fake news”

Do this for a happier, more productive life. #MyTop10


The New Year is a time for new beginnings and much needed changes in our lives, homes and communities. While change is hard, success is simpler than we think. Reducing stress, saving time and better interactions with others are all quite doable. Here is my list of 10 rules for a better, happier and more productive 2017:

  1. Respect time-yours and others. There is nothing more frustrating or disrespectful than ignoring the value of time. It is the one thing you can never recover.
  2. Set goals. Living without goals is like taking a road trip without directions. You must at least have an idea of where you’d like to end up. Write it down, and remind yourself of them daily so that a step is taken in that direction on a regular basis.
  3. Be organized. Disorganization is the contributor of non-performance and wasting time. Find a method that works for you, and then use it.
  4. Communicate. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Tact matters, but being honest will prevent or resolve so many unnecessary dilemmas.
  5. Say thank you. Those who take the time and care enough to help or support you in even the smallest manner deserve the courtesy of appreciation. And, it is a positive reflection on you to do so.
  6. Be honest. A liar is worse than a thief, because you know to watch the thief; you don’t know how to discern the truth from a liar. Being honest is the best way to create and sustain healthy personal and professional relationships. The truth may not be easy, but it is more respectful and rewarding for everyone in the end.
  7. Be quiet. You don’t have to live out-loud, tell all you know, or repeat what you think you know. Think before you speak, and say less than you planned. Don’t use 100 words for what you can say in 20.
  8. Give back. Being selfish is never rewarding, and no matter how much you think you don’t have, you always have something to give to those less fortunate. Whether it is time, money, resources or even a kind word, make sure that you contribute to the pot from which we all withdraw.
  9. Do more. Productivity is the key to so many things, but many people prefer to slack and get by rather than to step up and produce. Don’t be a corner-cutter; give, and then give more. D your best, every time without complaint or compromise.
  10. Be thankful. Gratitude is the center of happiness. Remembering who you are and what you have and are capable of should always bring a sense of gratitude and appreciation. Without it, you’ll never have or be more than you are.

Give it a try, and Happy New Year!